Is that the smell of burning flesh? Ew.

I went to the cancer beds today. I typically wouldn't do this because of the risk of skin cancer (and I already have some iffy moles). But I was trying on my clothes, deciding which ones I will take to Fiji. I noticed many of them were short-sleeved and I got to thinking about my European heritage and how the Fijian sun is intense beyond belief and I thought "you wouldn't just get up tomorrow and run a marathon. You have to train for that." So I went tanning.

Then while I was laying there I thought about how a tanning bed would be one of the most dangerous places to be in an electrical fire. The obvious danger being if your bed was the one on fire. But let's assume the fire is in another stall. The music is blaring, the lights are humming, the fan is blowing. You would have to strain to hear a fire alarm in there. Another obstacle would be you're naked. The thought of people burning to death because they couldn't get their holister jeans zipped up terrifies me. A Place to Tan, listen up. I hope your fire alarm is loud enough that even the sleepy tanners will be able to hear it, and get at least their panties back on before exiting the building safely.